Many readers will enjoy this column because it's a prelude to the November 2nd presidential election, in which John Kerry was declared the winner, courtesy of my prolific dream. But those same readers may not be so happy if they fail to vote, and George "I'm the master of the universe" Bush is re-elected. Okay, before you get more flustered than you already are. Sample this!

On the night of April 30, 2004, while veering between sleep and insomnia, I dreamed about the presidential election. In the dream I saw John Kerry wildly pumping his fist as George W. Bush seethed with anger. At Bush's side stood his family. Jeb, who unlike four years ago, this time, failed to deliver the state of Florida to his brother's electorate column. Barbara, his mom, wearing her trademark pearls and gently wiping the tears from her son's face. Laura his wife of 27 years was soothing the wrinkles on his forehead; while his father, the elder Bush, stoically declared: "You should have gotten out of Iraq when you had the chance." Also on hand was the president's dog, Barney, who took one look at his master, and unleashed a smell so repulsive, the stench gravitated throughout the White House.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity, the 43rd president of the United States walked to the nearest mirror and somberly gazed at his reflection. There he stood, the man who spent four years making a mockery out of the English language. The man who didn't like holding press conferences because he was so lousy at it. The man who promised to restore dignity and morality to the White House following the exit of the Clinton administration. The man who thought that he and God worked hand-in-hand. And as the beleaguered Texan writhed in torment, Dubya realized that he was among a long line of presidents who failed to win a second term. The names read like a Who's Who of Political Duds: Gerald Ford, Jimmy Carter (Theoretically, Carter cannot be characterized as a dud since he is recognized as a senior statesman of the Democratic Party), Herbert Hoover, William Taft, Benjamin Harrison, Martin Van Buren, John Quincy Adams and who could forget George Bush senior? Waking up long enough to write down the above scenario, I was overtaken by the dream bug again. Once more I found myself entrenched in the events of November 2. However, unlike the first dream this one was more subdued.

As I recalled millions of voters including yours truly, went to the polls to elect the candidate theyn felt was capable of leading the country over the next four years. And as night drew near and the nation dissipated into its nocturnal ritual, I eagerly awaited the outcome. Hoping to avoid the massive media coverage I headed to the Internet. There, I saw a bulletin pointing out that Kerry had won his home state of Massachusetts. Surfing the net like a groupie in search of a hunk, I realized that despite technological advances, I still had to rely on television for results and updates
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