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Reform the UK flag!

iosaf = Mr O'as if = sofia "the ipsiphi" | 17.03.2005 14:05 | Culture

On the occasion of the day of Patrick, patron saint of Ireland, an island country (about the size of Virginia) located to the west of the principality of Cymru & the Kingdoms of Scotland & Engurland, The permanent assembly (auto-appointed) @rtists & activists & inteleKtools demand-

remove this cross from the UK flag please.
remove this cross from the UK flag please.


"The removal of the Patrick's cross from the flag of the United Kingdom".

As you might not have noticed, the flag of the United Kingdom where many United Kollectivers live and work and collect grubs and stuff, is a juxtaposition of three crosses.

1 for Saint Andrew and bonnie Scotland the realm of the Stuarts.
(we'll go into that another day)
1 for Saint George, a.k.a. Jordi who killed the dragon patron saint of Catalonia. (where we the permanent collective assembly (self appointed) of @rtists & activists & inteleKtools live)
1 for Saint Patrick who expelled the snakes and liars.

The British Union and Constitution has undergone upheaval and reform at eight pivotal points in its history.

The Irish people have played a key role in all of them.
And many of the key decisions were made on Irish soil.

The establishment thus, by the Irish people of the present
geographic limits of the UK is based on the 1922 settlement which afforded the majority calvinist religious community of "ulster scots" speakers (a type of pre-Irving Welsh) to stay in the UK of GB and NI as your collection of states is formally known, (check your passport).

The flag of the NI statelet is that of George with the "red hand" in the centre.

Thus to be all hogworty and quiditch on you,
You have had no right to the Patricks cross on your flag
since 1922.

Other things you mightn't know about the only foreign country with which you share a frontier-

Ireland is traditional divided into “regions”

These include the Gaeltacht where people speak Gaeilge a modernised form
Of Goidelic.
Ulster which is divided into two parts “the free bit” and the “the god’s own bit”
where the people either speak “ulsterscots” an ancient form of Irving Welsh or HibernoEnglish an eastern dialect of American.
Leinster, Connaught, where people farm eggs, launder money and build roads are not worthy of serious comment.
Dublin, and some parts of north Lahndin make up the other more populous regions.

Ireland is very important for several reasons-

it occupies positions in the the top ten economic, educational, and human development indicators on the planet, the UK occupies between the thirteen and thirty.

It breeds American presidents.

It is in dispute with the British ( a war like people ) Iceland, (they look like björk) and Denmark, (their royal couple is more popular than Charles and Camila) the Faroe Islands continental shelf boundary.

Ireland signed the Good Friday agreement with Tony Blair in 1998 by which it was agreed to crucify a troublesome radical man known as Christ.

Ireland is test marketing zone for the British market, so they get to taste limited edition nestlé products before you do.

Ireland invented received pronunciation “RP” or “posh-speak” as its known by infiltrating the 1930s BBC pronunciation comitee with no less than five of its nationals.

Ireland has been a member of the indymedia community since the beginning, and it was an irishman who suggested calling the UK “united kollectives”.

The Irish are responsible for the United Kingdom’s constitution which is based on the 1922 settelment between the Irish Free State and the UK of GB and NI and by hosting the William of Orange versus James gig/war.

The Irish were responsible for your good governance in the XIX century.

The Irish invented both the words "tory" and "boycott".

The Irish were responsible for you winning the war against Napoleon.

The Irish helped you win the First World War.

The Irish helped you win the Second World War.

The Irish are more €uropean than you are.

The Irish don’t produce plutonium – you do.

The Irish are liked by everyone. – no-one likes you.

The Irish are stronger, fairer, more fleet of foot, mend better rhymes,& saddle horses better than you do.

The Irish have less cars than you do.

The Irish get better hollywood movie roles.

U2, Bob Geldof, James Bond, Terry Wogan, Mother Teresa and Brad Pitt, Ghandi, Pol Pot, Anne Bolyne, Diana Spencer, Bodecia, Anne Bronte and Dr Paisley are all / were all Irish.

The Irish are very good at playing Quiditch.

The Irish are on “your side”

If you need any help with emerging democracy issues,
counter-terrorism, freedom of information, tax cuts,
migration policies, pouring a decent pint, the proper orthography of whiskey or ditching Blair

don't hesitate to ask us.

Gurb Mile maith agaibh!
=
Thank ye very much!
& good luck with your war.

iosaf = Mr O'as if = sofia "the ipsiphi"

Comments

Hide the following 9 comments

nice

17.03.2005 16:48

wonderful idea

abu mufaja


I just loved the bit about the Irish helping us to win the second world war

17.03.2005 19:36

because, you see, during the Battle of the Atlantic, thousands of British and American seamen died. In the early part of the war, there were no long range aircraft to patrol the Atlantic, and warships often had to return early to refuel.

So: the Irish Government was asked if it could provide an airfield for British and American aircraft, and a port for convoy escorts. The reply was no - Ireland was neutral in the war against fascism.

And in May 1945, when Berlin fell, the Irish President, de Valera, very properly went to the German Embassy in Dublin to sign the condolence book after the death of the German Head of State, Herr Hitler.

So thanks for the help.

sceptic


nationalism

17.03.2005 20:25

national pride... so C20th.

- -


oh tis that old chestnut.

17.03.2005 20:52

did I say the Irish people who stayed on the island *& in the Eire state*
and survived on one third rations of those available to those in Britain during
the blockade helped you win the second war?

or did I mention the designers of your active service units behind lines?
or the many Irish men (and women) who served in the allied forces
fighting Nazi-ism?

Someday you will understand the De Valera game.
As someday you will understand the Churchill game.

Someday you will understand both the Great war and the 2nd war
and all the wars in a different way.

But you're not going to get there with a Blair/Orwell Big Brother regime.

Now its in very poor taste to bring Dev and Hitler
into our St Patrick's message to you. We'll just have to
remind you about Thatcher and Pinochet on Georgie's day.

We in the permanent collective assembly (auto-appointed)
of €rtists, activists & inteleKshools, Barcelona section
think you're a racist and jingoist, typically leaping to defend your flag.
probably a chelsea fan and drunken hooligan to boot.
tsk tsk!
shame on you!
no whiskey or properly poured pints for you!
you're barred!




-


It is a bit early for April Fool!

17.03.2005 21:26

I hope this is an early April Fool!

The Fool of April


The union flag is not mine

17.03.2005 21:28

My flag looks more like this
My flag looks more like this

The union jack / union flag is not "my" flag (I just happen to live in the UK), so do whatever you want with it, see if I care.

Simon


WHAAAA your all middle class

17.03.2005 21:54

well up until the early eighties "we" would never call irish folk middle class, well it just didn't seem
right even though i did run into one or two snooty types, mainly women, from time to time.
But that has all changed and now you are fully equipped with a full quota of Hoo ray henrys
and the massed ranks of the professional classes are busy gentrificating all the choice areas.
Out in the west all the farmers swopped their Morris minors an Morris Oxfords for Mercedes and
Range Rovers
Dublin all the good bars with snugs have been ripped out and the place is overrun loud mouthed
middle class twats showing off and talking loud about computers and corporate bollox ..
which is exactly what you EU DIRECTIVE'S dictate ..
You did have the monopoly on the revolutionary folk music (industry) for a long time, even though
a lot of the songs were written by and about English people and their social struggles,
you've lost a lot of your "paddy street creds and turned into just another bunch of euro lefty radical chic,
yeah ... I'll try a Jamies




Batt Flattery


nothing like jumping to conclusions

17.03.2005 23:12

"think you're a racist and jingoist, typically leaping to defend your flag.
probably a chelsea fan and drunken hooligan to boot."

when all else fails, resort to personal attacks.

sceptic


question?

18.03.2005 04:10

I just wanted to say if Pol Pot was Irish then all the poor people he murdered must hate Ireland then, eh?

neveryoumind


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