At 19:30 this evening around 20 Jews turned up to disrupt and protest against an secret event between the Jewish National Fund (JNF) and the openly racist and completely fascist Israeli foreign minister, Avigdor Lieberman. The weapon of choice? Bagels.

The chauffeur driven Rolls Royces made it clear that Avigdor seemed to be meeting some of the top funders of the JNF, who fundraise on behalf of Israel.

Outside the Finchley Road mansion a group of twenty or so Jews, of all ages, caused quite a kerfufel and made it clear that no matter how secretively the Jewish right tries to opperate, Israel's policy towards Palestinians is so abonable that they can't stop leaks to the left.

Three anarchists attempted to get into the party but were foiled by private security guards - the CST or Israeli embassy agents. Many of the aged inflow of guests didn't even mind being called fascists, infact one thought it was a compliment.

Then the anarchists threw bagels at the guards and guests whilst chanting, "Avigdor, Avigdor, come out you fascist!" The idea was to make him choke on a bagel, afterall, Jewish cookery almost killed off Bush when a pretzel stuck itself in his throat, proving that traditional Jewish cookery is inherently anti-fascist.

Next, an anarchist read a poem by the foremost Holocaust surviving author Primo Levy, Song of Those Who Died in Vain, with an obvious addition, whilst standing ontop of a driveway wall. See below for version read (addition marked in caps).

The boring police came along and pushed the crowd across the road, which it did, and then even more obnoxiously carried away each of the protesters, who were by now sitting, so that they was not directly opposite the building. Now they were opposite, but 3m to the left. There were about the same amount of police as protestors. The Police were especially concerned about the 'projectiles' thrown, which who knows, might have actually been the most fearsome thing thrown at the security guards, all of whom were Israeli, and not exactly the types to refuse their draft. But, you never can know.

Avigdor didn't come out, unfortunately. Perhaps he's heard about how a bunch of Jewish anti-fascists smashed in Mosley's knees after WWII, ending the spectre of fascism in Britain for a good part of the century.

Lieberman will be awaiting your protests TWICE tommorow morning (Wed 13 May).

8.30am at the Intercontinental Hotel in Park Lane, Lieberman is speaking at an event hosted by Ron Prosor, Israeli ambassador to the UK.

10.30am-12 noon, Foreign Office, Whitehall, where Lieberman is speaking to the foreign secretary, David Milliband.

And yes, he really, really, really is a fascist. Probably more so than Leonard Zelig.


Primo Levy
Song of Those Who Died in Vain

Sit down and bargain
All you like, grizzled old foxes.
We’ll wall you up in a splendid palace
With food, wine, good beds and a good fire
Provided that you discuss, negotiate
For our and your children’s lives.
May all the wisdom of the universe
Converge to bless your minds
And guide you in the maze.
But outside in the cold we will be waiting for you,
The army of those who died in vain,
We of the Marne, of Montecassino,
Treblinka, Dresden, Hiroshima AND GAZA.
And with us will be
The leprous and the people with trachoma,
The Disappeared Ones of Buenos Aires,
Dead Cambodians and dying Ethiopians,
The Prague negotiators,
The bled-dry of Calcutta
The innocents slaughtered in Bologna.
Heaven help you if you come out disagreeing:
You’ll be clutched tight in our embrace.
We are invincible because we are the conquered,
Invulnerable because already dead;
We laugh at your missiles.
Sit down and bargain
Until your tongues are dry.
If the havoc and the shame continue
We’ll drown you in our putrefaction.