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Stop Bilderberg Campaign Began With £50 Billion Bonus at Climate Camp

Nick Martian | 31.08.2010 21:05 | Climate Chaos | Ecology | Workers' Movements | Liverpool | World

This is the true story of what REALLY HAPPENED at the Camp for Climate Action in Edinburgh while the police were trying to stop us from closing down the Royal Bank of Scotland and the FASCIST NAZI EXTREMISTS from the English Defence League were threatening and abusing us.
Continuing our gripping yarn about how THE ECO-WARRIORS are fighting back against the EVIL BILDERBERG CONSPIRACY by reclaiming the £50 billion of the PEOPLES' MONEY that the capitalist system bailed out the Royal Bank of Scotland with so they could save the British economy, but instead they kept it ALL FOR THEMSELVES!!!



THE ECO-WARRIORS at the climate camp were ACTUALLY RECLAIMING the £50 billion bailout money FROM THE VAULTS of the headquarters of the Royal Bank of Scotland...
BILDERBERG is planning a massive GLOBAL LAND GRAB using the money that the capitalist banking system stole during the SO-CALLED CREDIT CRUNCH.
The eco-warriors' MASTER PLAN at the climate camp was to TUNNEL INTO THE RBS headquarters to recover the PEOPLES' MONEY while the police and the EDL were distracted.

The CODED MESSAGE from Martyn Healer saying 500 eco-warriors WERE TOO SCARED to come to climate camp was THE SIGNAL for me to spring into action.
I took a FIRE EXTINGUISHER and a wet blanket into my tent and I posted on Twitter HELP! I'M TERRIFIED edl will BURN US ALL TO DEATH!
A desperate appeal to MAX CLIFFORD to save climate camp by getting WORLDWIDE PUBLICITY was also posted as another RED HERRING or wild goose.
I put a sign on my tent "FREAKING OUT - DO NOT DISTURB" and got to work DIGGING THE TUNNEL – My map showed WW2 air raid shelter right under my tent.

I posted the story of threats from the EDL on Indymedia and said I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE to distract attention from what was REALLY GOING ON at climate camp.
Everyone was laughing at me but I COULDN'T BELIEVE MY LUCK There was a hole UNDER MY TENT and I didn't have to do MUCH DIGGING!
I cleared away the entrance to the AIR RAID SHELTER which was like a GIANT RABBIT HOLE – it was DARK IN THERE and hard to SEE ANYTHING.

There was SOMETHING IN THE TUNNEL ahead of me – it looked suspiciously like a WHITE RABBIT leading the way – I MIGHT HAVE TO EAT IT.
With only a HEAD TORCH and a few tools I went DOWN THE TUNNEL from climate camp towards RBS to begin the process of destroying global capitalism.
THE RABBIT seemed to know WHERE IT WAS GOING so I followed it as the tunnel went EVEN DEEPER under the river and towards the RBS HQ.

After living with THE ECO-WARRIORS on the road protests in the 1990s I knew they could be DEPENDED ON to reclaim THE PEOPLES' MONEY.
If we could stop the government ROAD BUILDING programme we could DO ANYTHING, even get THE PEOPLES' MONEY back and close down the capitalist system.
THE MASTER PLAN was to take ALL THE MONEY out of the vault and load it into trucks UNDER COVER OF DAYLIGHT while the climate camp was BEING CLEARED!

THERE WAS LIGHT at the end of the LONG AND WINDING TUNNEL that led to the RBS bank HQ and STRAIGHT TO THE VAULT full of billions of pounds!
The VAULT WAS A FORTRESS like Fort Knox I locked the door FROM INSIDE They'll never get in All we need is to get the cash OUT OF HERE.
It certainly looked like £50 BILLION! So that's what they did with PUBLIC'S BAILOUT MONEY I wonder if they'll NOTICE IT MISSING?

I WAS GETTING HUNGRY No food in there The money LOOKED NICE but it didn't taste TOO GOOD Maybe I should have EATEN THE RABBIT?
IT WAS A BIT COLD I thought of burning some money to KEEP WARM while waiting for the trucks to come but what if it all CAUGHT FIRE?
There were 500 ECO-WARRIORS ready with trucks to SPIRIT AWAY the £50 billion bailout money THROUGH THE TUNNEL from the RBS vaults!!

We would have to LUG THE CASH OUT through the tunnel back to the field NOBODY WILL NOTICE if we say it's just the SHIT FROM THE TOILETS!
RBS won't be able to TELL THE POLICE or admit they STASHED ALL THE CASH which they were meant to use to GET THE ECONOMY GOING AGAIN.
It all went ACCORDING TO PLAN - 500 activists with trucks were waiting ready to COLLECT THE LOOT - £50 billion - That was £100 million each!!

THE ECO-WARRIORS ARRIVED and we loaded the trucks WITH THE MONEY while the police thought we were CLEARING THE RUBBISH off the climate camp site!
We were AS QUIET AS MICE blending in with SITE CLEAN-UP CREW who didn't realise we were loading the trucks with £50 BILLION IN CASH!
RBS CAN'T ADMIT they took the £50 billion bailout and kept it WE'RE NOT THIEVES We will give the PEOPLES' MONEY BACK TO THE PEOPLE.

RBS will have to COVER IT UP and pretend it didn't happen This could cause a RUN ON THE BANKS and destroy the CAPITALIST SYSTEM.
WE GOT THE CASH right under noses of the police UNDER COVER of the medieval siege tower COMEDY SHOW and the catapult to FIRE TREACLE at RBS.
Everybody was laughing at us but WE'VE GOT ALL THE MONEY NOW and we've got serious work to do – IT IS QUITE FUNNY I guess, Ha ha ha!!

We are going to START A REVOLUTION to close down the political and economic system in Britain with LOCAL PEOPLES' BANKS everywhere!
The new ALTERNATIVE SYSTEM of localisation, environmentalism, and environmental economics will have LOCAL CURRENCIES in all local areas.
WE WILL TRANSFORM the banking system and create a UTOPIAN PARADISE on earth and give the cash back to the people to SAVE HUMANITY from being driven to extinction by the burning of fossil fuels.

We will DESTROY CAPITALISM with their own money Maybe we'll PUT IT IN A CATAPULT and fire it back at them – THAT'LL TEACH THEM!
While the EVIL NAZIS and the police were fighting EACH OTHER the eco-warriors had bigger fish to fry - So long and THANKS FOR ALL THE CASH.
DID THE IDIOTS really think we were trying to BREAK THE BANK with treacle fired at the RBS HQ building from a MEDIEVAL SIEGE TOWER?

The CAMP FOR CLIMATE ACTION in Edinburgh was just an Enid Blyton FAMOUS FIVE story updated for the 21st century with a HAPPY ENDING.
And they all lived HAPPILY EVER AFTER except for the police and the EVIL NAZI MONSTERS who are still BANGING THEIR NUTS together.

STOP BILDERBERG CAMPAIGN oil companies paying Nazi groups to DENY GLOBAL WARMING and threaten activists ECO-WARRIORS FIGHT BACK.

Nick Martian
- e-mail: earthaidcampaign@gmail.com

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  1. WHAT — derpington
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